A New Year. Fresh and shiny. It beckons with possibility.
The “thing to do” in a New Year is to make resolutions and set goals. I shy away from this typically, preferring to choose a theme to focus on, such as communication, education, realtionships, etc.
This year it occurred to me that my reticence to set goals might just be fear. Oh Fear. You again?
Declaring lofty goals brings up fear of failure for me. Citing evidence of past failures, I become convinced that I will let myself down if I aim too high.
But if I get really clear the biggest tragedy of any of my failures is that I let one misstep derail me. A slight meander off the path to my goal somehow became proof that I simply wasn’t good enough to achieve it. Feeling not good enough gave me cause to quit.
If I get really, really clear it is all ridiculous. The mind can spin fabulous tales. I have created images of my failures that are out of proportion with reality. I see myself falling flat on my face in front of a giant crowd, the contents of my purse spilling everywhere, my skirt up over my head, everyone pointing and laughing.
When I remove the filter of shame, I can see that what really happened is more equivalent to tripping as I walked down the sidewalk, maybe two people even noticed.
So my theme/goal this year to is to rewrite the stories that I tell myself about my ability to achieve. In truth I do have data that shows I have the capacity to persevere. But those are not the stories that replay themselves over and over again in my psyche. Interesting, isn’t it?
As I work to rewrite old stories and create new ones, I have given myself some guideposts for 2015:
Take Bold Steps
Try Again (it isn’t over if you take a tumble)
As you move through this year I hope you do so with love.
I hope you remember that you are always worth one more try.
I hope that the stories you tell yourself are honest and forgiving.
I hope that you walk boldly, writing new and wonderful stories to share with us all.
3 Responses to Stories, Old and New
If it makes you feel better, you’re not the only one who struggles with this. You have LOTS of company.
Thank you Lisa! Yes, we are never alone in our struggles. It is good to have company, and even better to keep that company as we ALL move forward. That way we can cheer each other on 🙂
4 worthy resolutions worth emulating. Will move forward into 2015 with you. Madre
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